A New Direction

Mark 1:16-20 NLT

One day as Jesus was walking along the shore of the Sea of Galilee, he saw Simon and his brother Andrew throwing a net into the water, for they fished for a living. Jesus called out to them, “Come, follow me, and I will show you how to fish for people!” And they left their nets at once and followed him.
A little farther up the shore Jesus saw Zebedee’s sons, James and John, in a boat repairing their nets. He called them at once, and they also followed him, leaving their father, Zebedee, in the boat with the hired men.

This is how I feel right now. I am just so done with school, depravity, assessing others, assessing myself, explaining myself, all of it.

I just want a lifestyle, an occupation, a career where I can just love God and love people, and do it with music. I have the tools, I just need the platform.

And I’m convinced college isn’t quite the road to take. At least not where I’m at right now, in the state that it’s currently in.

I’m done doing people favors, acting out what they didn’t, and what I thought was so important not so long ago. When did it become a crime for Christians to want Jesus, and Jesus alone?

It’s terrifying to think how loved ones will react, and how if I take that leap of faith, it’s only by faith in what He did and is doing I can expect to survive and be provided for.

When it comes right down to it, a lot of us “religious” people have so little to do with God it’s disgusting, myself included. And we’re not fighting.

I want to fight.

I realize I need…. more

Still Endureth-ing Forever

Just when I thought the book of Lamentations was going to be my gallon of ice cream during my struggle:

20 I will never forget this awful time,
as I grieve over my loss.

21 Yet I still dare to hope
when I remember this:

22 The faithful love of the Lord never ends!
His mercies never cease.

23 Great is his faithfulness;
his mercies begin afresh each morning.

24 I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance;
therefore, I will hope in him!”

Lamentations 3:20-24

The Modern Christian’s Inherited Blessing (and Accompanying Command)!

“There should be no poor among you, for the Lord your God will greatly bless you in the land he is giving you as a special possession. You will receive this blessing if you are careful to obey all the commands of the Lord your God that I am giving you today. The Lord your God will bless you as he has promised.

You will lend money to many nations but will never need to borrow. You will rule many nations, but they will not rule over you.

“But if there are any poor Israelites in your towns when you arrive in the land the Lord your God is giving you, do not be hard-hearted or tightfisted toward them. Instead, be generous and lend them whatever they need.

Do not be mean-spirited and refuse someone a loan because the year for canceling debts is close at hand. If you refuse to make the loan and the needy person cries out to the Lord, you will be considered guilty of sin.

Give generously to the poor, not grudgingly, for the Lord your God will bless you in everything you do. There will always be some in the land who are poor. That is why I am commanding you to share freely with the poor and with other Israelites in need.” – Deuteronomy 15

http://bible.us/Deut15.4.NLT

The Road Home…

I’ve arrived home. Though the drive back was quite entertaining (my family… *amused sigh*), things are depressingly similar to how they were on August 23 when I left them forever.

Guess some things never change, no matter how much I assume they would in my absence. That said, a lot of things that were good ant stable when I left are now a bit disjointed and a little awkward to envision in their current state. (and I haven’t even heard the good 3-month-first-college-semester-timegap gossip yet!)

I feel like I should take a bit of insult with the fact that my bed has been removed. I can only sort of complain, though. I’m a sucker for interior design, and my room looks superb with one less bed cluttering up the space…

Sociological.

We just did a class assignment in Sociology concerning the monetary generosity of the American public. She gave the scenario of a money tree, giving us $1,000 imaginary dollars, and telling us donate as much as we want to the “Money Tree”, which would double our money and distribute it back out evenly among everyone in the class, whether they gave anything or not.

Sounded a lot like the stock market to me. Then things got interesting.

After calculating the money pool and determining we’d each get $1094.19 returns, she asked who in the class made off with more than $2,000; she quickly corrected herself, realizing (mistakenly) that no one could have actually made that much money overall, though many of my classmates were certainly claiming they did.

For a second there, it sounded a lot like what I had watched in the documentary “The Warning” yesterday, concerning the impact of “Over-the-Counter Derivatives” on both the stock market crash in 1998 and the recent (current?) recession.

Turns out my teacher’s mental math was flawed, and the students who gave nothing made of with well over $2,000, but it struck me how the scenario parallelled the precursors to our country’s economic woes, where promises and possibilities of gaudy returns based upon imaginary money and impossibly complicated (read: faulty) math collapsed the efficiency of those in control of the money (my teacher and her calculator).

A Gospel Celebration

previously published in the Pepperdine Graphic. for when my stories don’t get put on the website.

I feel it should be established that I hail from the group of students here at Pepperdine that has no connection to the Church of Christ.

I also identify with the group of Pepperdine students who have spent at least some of their childhood in churches on in the more “charismatic” side of the spectrum. Specifically, the “black church,” if you will.

However, for the past several years I had been attending churches on the other side of the spectrum (“white church”), due to my family’s evolving preferences, among other factors. I’ve continued this trend since arriving on campus, though I’ve desired a change since acquiring new found independence.

For that reason, it’s been my personal preference to avoid Church of Christ venues and the like, including such offerings on and near campus. I need my instrumental worship, “call-and-response” sermons and an atmosphere a little more “upbeat” than most. I grew up with it, after all.

The Waveside Reality of Calvary in L.A.

eugh.

In my search for the perfect church (for me) in or near Malibu, I have been around the block and back again searching for something different. Just a little shake-up, compared to what I’ve been involved in for the past several years back home in Indiana.

I’ve been to Waveside Church in Malibu, a church literally on the shores of the Pacific Ocean where things were good, but not all that different compared to, well, every other predominantly white church that I’ve been attending since Christian Fellowship Church back in Evansville. The worship leader at Wavwside was Black, though. But when she’s belting Philips Craig and Dean and Mike Tomlin, is it really all that different?

Simply Affiliated

previously published in the Pepperdine Graphic. for when my stories don’t get put on the website.

what things should be.

You could say that when it comes to politics I don’t really value my opinion, and with good reason. Much like many voters who actually went to the polls, my logic used to determine my positions is a bit— lacking.

I’m from Indiana, where I don’t vote— chalk it up to apathy. I don’t know California’s state issues too well, other than that the budget numbers are subterranean, the potheads are staging some Prohibition reversal-esque revolution and in an absolutely shocking turn of events, corporations (or at least their former CEO’s) are trying to take over, fascist-pig style.

I loved it. The whole hoopla and how serious the media was making everything out to be made me want to get out and vote. Almost.

A World Gone Loko

previously published in the Pepperdine Graphic. for when my stories don’t get put on the website.

Four Loko varieties

So let me get this straight. Bone straight.

A dozen undergrads at Central Washington University are hospitalized earlier this month after heavy partying, involving consumption of lots of alcohol throughout the night.

After “careful” research and examination, the police and medical investigators have declared the culprit as the drink, a malt beverage known as “Four Loko” described as an “alcoholic energy drink”. (yikes!)

I’m sorry, but I see a problem here.

Algerian Rain Dance (a rap about The Stranger by Albert Camus)

written for an English project after reading “The Stranger” in class.

Maman died today. What else can I say?

Camels and Starbucks; be back at work on Monday anyway.

I love my mom and all, I just don’t want to see her dead face

So what if I don’t cry, and can’t remember her age?

Don’t make me justify my love. Who am I? Madonna?

It’s a funeral, yes, but it reminds me of a sauna.

CHORUS: I know the world has customs, traditions, and a judging eye

but I’d rather sit at home and watch the cars go by.

This ain’t a cry for attention, because I’d rather be unwatched

So let’s swim, smoke, and have sex. Lots.